It takes courage to grow up and become who you really are." ~e.e. cummings. I wrote this in a diary entry over last summer - an experience I like to title, "Two Months of Mayhem All Over Another Continent." I explored, removed myself completely from any kind of comfort zone, and approached life with an open mind. For the first time I dedicated myself to stepping out of my virtual life box, with a strong desire to not remain the person I was once. It was sometimes painful and confusing, but if you have ever seen a caterpillar become a butterfly, you understand that the process of change is messy.
One thing I have certainly discovered is that there are many ways to live life and I'm working on my own path - something that I am sure I will be re-defining the rest of life. But the point is not discovering a way of living and then sitting there because it appears to be the best way, the "right" way. The goal is to constantly re-imagine, grow, and change - with a heart, soul and mind free of the walls, cages, and boxes that society claims are necessary.
I live now in a very human, open-heart, open-mind way. My desire to love God and others is always intact, and everything else gets figured out along the way. But living with tremendous love frees me from all the limiting, "boxy" thoughts and opinions I held previously. And from the fear of doing "the wrong thing" (whatever that actually means).
The point I've reached is an unstable one. I've left school, left much of my previous beliefs, and jumped into a sea of existence that's uncharted. I'm left with only an inner compass, my heart, to follow for better or for worse. Where are the walls? Where are the boxes? What about the cage of reality? I suppose I was born to remove myself from that. Idealism is possibly my curse, but I cling to its optimism.
"Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover." ~ Mark Twain
